It’s hard not to notice just how many foreigners are visiting Japan these days.
At the airport, I saw long lines of international travelers waiting at immigration, while the line for Japanese nationals was almost empty.
In Tokyo, it’s becoming more and more common to see convenience store staff and customers who are both non-Japanese, communicating in Japanese as if it’s no big deal.
I can really feel how much the times have changed.
With the rise of digital nomad visas, I see more and more social media posts featuring real estate in Japan aimed at foreigners.
It feels like Japan’s “borders” have become much easier to cross.
And in this new global flow, I can’t help but think—maybe we’re about to see a rise in international relationships too.
But when people from different countries meet and are drawn to each other, communication barriers or cultural differences may lead to doubts—like, “Is it really possible to build a serious relationship?”
It’s easy to imagine situations where a couple gets married without fully understanding each other’s language, only to later face communication breakdowns, and have those around them say, “See? I knew it wouldn’t work.”
Language Isn’t Everything
But in reality, there are many couples who make it work—even without perfectly fluent communication.
My English isn’t perfect either. But I always felt that as long as both people keep learning and growing during the relationship, language shouldn’t be a dealbreaker.
Just earlier, I happened to watch a short video that spoke exactly to this.
It featured an American man—someone like a spiritual leader—who’s married to a Japanese woman.
He said with a laugh, “We couldn’t even understand each other when we first met.”
But he explained that they connected on a soul level, so it was never a problem.
They’ve now been in a happy relationship for seven years.
It was just a few seconds long, so I didn’t catch all the details. I forgot to write down his name, and although I thought I followed him, I haven’t been able to find the video again.
He might actually be someone well-known. His message really stuck with me.
To say, “Energetic alignment matters more than verbal communication” might sound a bit extreme.
But from the perspective of international marriage, I totally get it.
Being able to recognize someone’s true nature—that’s incredibly important.
It’s the kind of knowing that goes beyond thinking—it's something you feel.
Beyond Appearances—The Reality of International Marriages
In online communities for people living abroad, I often see posts about domestic violence from foreign partners, painful divorce procedures, mental and financial struggles… the reality can be heavy.
I’m honestly shocked by how many people suddenly get handed divorce papers out of nowhere.
I know quite a few people who have been through it. Even divorces between two Japanese people can get messy—so when it happens while living abroad, the difficulty multiplies. It’s hard to even imagine.
That’s why I believe: It’s not about the “conditions,” it’s about the “feeling.”
Not about “words,” but about “energy.”
Behind sweet words, smiles, and appealing surface-level traits lies the person’s true essence.
And to sense that essence—to tune into their humanity—you need to be someone who also lives honestly and in tune with yourself.
If you keep ignoring your own feelings, or overlook signs that something doesn’t feel quite right—especially when living abroad—things could become incredibly difficult later on.
from My Own Journey
When I got married internationally for the first time, I wasn’t thinking about any of this.
I was totally carefree—and in the end, that marriage ended in divorce.
But because I had taken time to really see the other person’s true nature, we were able to avoid a nasty or drawn-out separation.
For that, I’m deeply grateful.
When there’s a persistent unease in your partnership, it’s important to reflect:
Is this a red flag—your intuition warning you?
Or is it a temporary contrast that needs to be released so you can co-create something new together?
By the time I entered my second (international) marriage, I had a much better understanding of the laws of the universe.
I was lucky to know how to navigate those early moments of doubt and discomfort.
Even now, we’re still actively co-creating the relationship we truly desire.
Letting go and abandoning something are not the same.
That’s an important distinction to keep in mind.
Someone recently opened up to me about their own relationship struggles, and it inspired me to share some of these thoughts here ♡